remember to feed the kids

don’t put your eye at laser beam height

do not rub the belly

don’t negotiate against yourself

follow the grid

don’t give advice without a license

never trust user input

read the fucking manual

make sure it’s a reproducible issue

never blow off a worried nurse

don’t spar after eating

always upload to unlisted

don’t have sex with your clients

don’t root@machine ~# rm -R *

always test your knots

every paragraph needs a topic sentence

don’t make your own cryptosystem

write drunk edit sober

don’t let your rope get behind your horse

always test your backups

never install the latest version of an Adobe product

hot glass looks exactly the same as cold glass

don’t overstride

never hit send on your first draft

don’t deploy on fridays

cite your sources

do not drink the uncertain liquid

if it isn’t documented, it didn’t happen

you’re tempting fate to label a file “final”

if it doesn’t go in the bag as soon as you’re finished with it, it will be lost

measure twice, cut once

are you missing a semicolon?

save your file before photoshop crashes

always clear the bridge wing before putting the rudder over

make sure it’s plugged in and turned on

make sure you’re using the right sized hook

don’t touch the blue table

take temperature and O2 stat immediately

don’t tell the customer to fuck off

make sure not to assume what you’re trying to prove

it’s not about you