though if i take things in perspective
\ni am being nitpicky and missing the larger point of education<\/p>\n
what is the larger point of education
\ntake it from a hustler-wannabe who has read all the books for hustler-wannabes
\nyou can get your education + hustle anyway
\nthere’s a funny chance that if you email your tutor
\nand they give you a shitty reason and you ask for elaboration in a sincere, concerned way
\nthey might just give you A+ next time to shut you up<\/p>\n
maybe, maybe not.
\ni guess the more useful part
\nwould be to find out how i could improve on my writing to an A+ standard<\/p>\n
yep
\nthat’s the most important thing of all
\nrefinement
\nthat’s what mentors are for what
\nA- is a sign you need to work harder on something
\nthe email is what you send to find out what that something IS
\ninstead of playing mastermind with your grades<\/p>\n
yap
\nchallenging myself is what really matters in the end.<\/p>\n
i think what ultimately matters is expressed along the lines of
\nlearning\/knowing how to use what you have to get from where you are to where you want to be
\n#semantics<\/p>\n
where i want to be isn’t an specific identifiable socioeconomic situation though
\nit’s just the end of myself.<\/p>\n
sure<\/p>\n
i just want to be at my limit<\/p>\n
still applies what<\/p>\n
yeap yeap<\/p>\n
so
\nhow do you know when you are at your limit<\/p>\n
you don’t i guess
\nyou just push and push
\nit’s easy to gauge though
\nbetween 75% to 85% etc
\nwhen u know u still have enough left in the tank
\nthe difference between 95% and 97% harder to tell<\/p>\n
I think realistically
\nhm
\ni think it doesn’t really matter that much as long as we’re consistently, effectively past our comfort zones
\nso suppose that happens at 90%<\/p>\n
yeap that’s what i meant<\/p>\n
yeah<\/p>\n
well not really
\nnot fully i mean<\/p>\n
it gets complex because 90% today might be 50% tomorrow
\nthe scale is variable<\/p>\n
i guess when you’re in an area
\nwhere your performance peaks out according to an external quality standard
\nit’s hard to gauge the amount you’re pushing beyond measurin
\nthe amount of discomfort you go through<\/p>\n
technically I think you can’t
\ni don’t think it’s possible to measure the uncharted
\ni remember i think voltaire or bacon writing about descartes
\nhow he made lots of “silly mistakes”
\nbut only silly because he was too busy breaking new ground<\/p>\n
can leh i think lol
\ni mean for me
\ni’m such a lazy fucker
\nthat any amount of time spent studying or revising or doing homework
\nor preparing for class
\nis out of my comfort zone LOL<\/p>\n
but you’ve been doing that, right
\nso you need to shift your comfort zone marker alr<\/p>\n
for some modules more so than others, which is why i’m aware
\nthat my capacity is variable and not yet maxed<\/p>\n
like for myself, i didn’t study at all during sec sch or jc
\npathetic amounts after retaining- the really “you know you’re a goner” kind
\nthen i studied when retaking my A’s
\nharder than i’ve studied in my life for anything
\nbut that’s… still not that hard
\nit’s like a coach potato going for a walk
\nto continue the coach potato analogy
\nwould i have been able to run a 5k?
\nwithin that time period, given my motivation and perspective… i suspect it would have been possible, but i can’t prove it
\nwhat i’ve learnt more than anything else, I think, after all that pontificating and experimenting and “wasting” 2 years<\/p>\n
mmhm<\/p>\n
to continue with that analogy, i fucking hate walking
\nrunning, whatever
\ni could train for it
\nget better at it
\nand getting better is enjoyable
\nbut the entire pursuit is unsatisfying
\nfor me lah
\nwhereas, continuing couch potato analogy
\nwhenever i get in the pool to swim for fun
\ni always end up exceeding my allocated time
\nplanned to swim for an hour
\nfind myself still there 3 hours later
\nfunnily enough
\nmy strongest flash of insight came to me WHILE i was doing my exams
\ni was answering the english language and linguistics paper
\nand i was having so much fun putting my personal thoughts and perspectives into my response
\nmaybe i might feel differently 5-10 years from now
\ni became one of quora’s top writers in 2012 without intending to
\ni try and try to motivate myself to study and work hard in school and knn struggle so much and then feel bad about myself
\nthere’s a seth godin video where he talks about work vs. art and art is what we always want to do more of
\nnobody says “can I inspire one less person today, shag ah, lazy ah”
\nwhen you’re in the business of doing what your heart sings for
\nyou want to do more of it<\/p>\n
Mmmm
\nTrue.<\/p>\n
so i think- i could be rationalizing, self-serving, etc- but i think i should just chiong what i naturally want to do more of
\nif i’m in the pool for 3 hours when i wanted to spend 1, and i have to force myself to run every day
\ni might as well swim more
\nof course there are additional concerns like- what if you spend all your time in the pool but actually suck at it
\ni feel that way about music
\ni love music but i don’t think i’ll ever be phenomenal at it
\ni don’t see myself inspiring people musically
\ni’m sorry, this is such a selfish one way conversation LOL
\nyou leh
\nwhere are you at, vis-a-vis dis<\/p>\n
I hear you
\nI can easily spend a few hours revising a sentence or phrase in writing
\nWhich I wouldn’t spend in say, physical exercise lol<\/p>\n
i can cycle for hours
\nrunning cannot
\ni could perhaps train the latter, but cb cycling so much more fun
\nmusic how
\nvs. writing<\/p>\n
Music’s different
\nNo actually it’s the same.
\nWith writing I have no patience for woodshedding too
\nJust that writing offers a more direct route to creation<\/p>\n
i have far more patience to woodshed words than music
\ni think a part of this has to do with existing vocabulary, and vision
\ni can envision the sort of writer i would become (in blurry terms)
\nmusician not so much
\nso 10,000 hours of words is actually bloody exciting to me
\nwhile 10,000 hours of music, while intellectually fun, is emotionally a bit scary<\/p>\n
Opposite for me<\/p>\n
fun is the wrong word
\nAnyway I have to go shower and sleep lol<\/p>\n
sure, goodnight<\/p>\n
Sorry to cut the good conversation<\/p>\n
np rest well<\/p>\n
Meet up 1 on 1 sometime lah<\/p>\n
sure<\/p>\n
Cya<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
though if i take things in perspective i am being nitpicky and missing the larger point of education what is the larger point of education take it from a hustler-wannabe who has read all the books for hustler-wannabes you can get your education + hustle anyway there’s a funny chance… <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[23],"tags":[116],"class_list":["post-6289","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-reflections","tag-conversations-2"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p5gxNz-1Dr","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.visakanv.com\/archives\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6289","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.visakanv.com\/archives\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.visakanv.com\/archives\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.visakanv.com\/archives\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.visakanv.com\/archives\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=6289"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.visakanv.com\/archives\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6289\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":10064,"href":"https:\/\/www.visakanv.com\/archives\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6289\/revisions\/10064"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.visakanv.com\/archives\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6289"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.visakanv.com\/archives\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=6289"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.visakanv.com\/archives\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=6289"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}