That’s actually a very complex question, so I hope you don’t mind a slightly complex answer- I’ll try to keep it clear!<\/p>\n
There are things that I do that I disapprove of, that I find annoying. I am lacking in some skills- my perception is fallible, my judgement often even more so. I have habits that I don’t like, and I sometimes behave in ways that I find difficult to justify or explain, even to myself.<\/p>\n
But I try my absolute best (or really hard, at least) to draw a clear distinction between my “self” and my “skills”. I make a conscious effort to avoid defining “myself”. If I do something badly, if I hurt people, if I make mistakes- it’s upsetting, but I don’t allow myself to get pissed off with “myself”. I try to learn from the mistakes, and move on.<\/p>\n
The closest thing that I’ve come to getting pissed off with “myself” is when I find it hard NOT to get pissed off- with myself or anyone else. Let’s say something spoils my plans- like if I have conflicting schedules, or something isn’t going well- say my band is screwing up on stage, or I’m having a bad workout. I then tend to get cranky and irritable, which worsens my performance\/judgement\/actions, and then I get annoyed with myself for being cranky and irritable. It’s a silly, irrational loop that cannot be solved by directly applying my already-agitated mind onto it. I’m trying to acknowledge the loop there, to not be too hard on myself, to accept that it’s okay to be cranky and irritable, and I think I will soon make progress on this.<\/p>\n
So… no, there is nothing about “myself” that pisses me off. I’m making it a personal commitment not to do “pissed off” any more. The most I’ll go is mild annoyance\/irritation\/discomfort. The awesome side effect is that this carries over into my interaction with other people- I’ve become a lot more tolerant of people in general, and this enriches my relationships with everybody and my experience of life.<\/p>\n
It seems long and complicated but it’s really a very simple idea- we are too complex and complicated to be defined, so we cannot get pissed off with “ourselves”- if we make mistakes, we make amends, and all is good- and the same applies to other equally complicated and complex human beings.<\/p>\n