{"id":12710,"date":"2016-03-20T15:18:20","date_gmt":"2016-03-20T07:18:20","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.visakanv.com\/blog\/?p=9818"},"modified":"2016-03-20T15:18:20","modified_gmt":"2016-03-20T07:18:20","slug":"self-regulation","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.visakanv.com\/archives\/2016\/03\/20\/self-regulation\/","title":{"rendered":"How To Self Regulate"},"content":{"rendered":"

I think the solution to the problem of self-regulation will begin with really little things. If you suck at self-regulation, you can\u2019t suddenly change everything, turn everything around all at once overnight. You have to start with small things. So doing these word vomits is a step in the right direction, even if it doesn\u2019t feel like it. Doing my daily\/weekly work updates is a step, even if it doesn\u2019t feel like it. I just need to take more such steps, and then the feels will follow in response to the change in volume of output, in volume of shit done. \u2013\u00a00443 \u2013 GTD, prioritization, dealing with interruptions and distractions<\/a><\/p>\n

So I suppose the topic here is self-regulation. That\u2019s what I\u2019m trying to do right now. I\u2019m trying to take control of myself and do things that I say I want to do. I\u2019m used to coming up with a big impressive list of things that don\u2019t really get done- and then coming up with really good, valid excuses for why those things didn\u2019t get done. Now I\u2019m getting good at describing that series of events and ending with an uplifting things-are-gonna-get-better message. That\u2019s all touching and sweet, but what I need to get good next is a lot more succinct- I need to quickly identify what needs doing and then quickly do it. I\u2019ve been sitting around experimenting with meditation and thought experiments and it gives me this nice fuzzy feelings\u2026 I haven\u2019t yet reached nirvana. Any moment now. But even that feels like this very longwinded way of trying to confront my problems. \u2013\u00a00253 \u2013 blind hope, thought loops and conscious incompetence<\/a><\/p>\n

From a very young age I was very curious and inquisitive and read loads of books, comics, everything I could get my hands on. At the same time, I never developed much in terms of self-regulation or discipline. My parents didn\u2019t ask me to do any chores\u2013 I didn\u2019t have to make my bed, I didn\u2019t have to do the dishes. Their logic was\u2013 if they removed all of that from the equation, I would be able to focus entirely on my studies. I think on hindsight that was a bad idea. Children ought to be given lots of structure, a progressive amount of responsibility, a sense that they\u2019re participating in the household, not just being a sort of\u2026 absent, vacant member. \u2013\u00a00288 \u2013 a letter to JC retainees<\/a><\/p>\n

And this means that I\u2019ll sometimes not be able to build relationships with some people, because some people need others to be around them, to keep them in their thoughts, to do nice things for them, etc. I sometimes think that I\u2019d like to do things like that, but I can\u2019t keep things in my thoughts. My thoughts go wherever the hell they like. There\u2019s a part of the brain that most people have that regulates these things, and mine is underdeveloped. ADHD is an inability to internally self-regulate. That\u2019s why I think cigarettes were so awesome for me. They felt like some sort of stable pattern\/structure\/routine that I could contextualise things around. \u2013\u00a00156 \u2013 When Hitler Stole Pink Rabbit + ADHD<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I think the solution to the problem of self-regulation will begin with really little things. If you suck at self-regulation, you can\u2019t suddenly change everything, turn everything around all at once overnight. You have to start with small things. So doing these word vomits is a step in the right… <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[836],"tags":[600],"class_list":["post-12710","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-wip","tag-howto"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p5gxNz-3j0","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.visakanv.com\/archives\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12710","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.visakanv.com\/archives\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.visakanv.com\/archives\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.visakanv.com\/archives\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.visakanv.com\/archives\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=12710"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.visakanv.com\/archives\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12710\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.visakanv.com\/archives\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=12710"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.visakanv.com\/archives\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=12710"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.visakanv.com\/archives\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=12710"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}