“I deal with jealousy the same way I deal with narcissism- by reminding myself that everybody is infinitely complex, and that the concept of a distinct self is an illusion.
You can’t be proud of yourself because you don’t own you- you are the sum of everything you’ve read, everything you’ve come in contact with, everything anybody’s ever said to you.
Similarly, you can’t be jealous of anybody, because you don’t know them. There’s nothing to be jealous of. They experience a different reality. If you were in their shoes, you’d be jealous of somebody else.
So you’re not actually jealous of a person, because people are infinite. You’re jealous of a state. And states are fleeting, with diminishing returns. Desiring a state reduces the problem from one of identity (hard/impossible) to one of appetite, which is easier. Why do you care about one particular state? Entire suns are being birthed right this very second. I’m grateful for the opportunity to be a part of this great cosmic dance.
Your state, your success, your writing skills, all of that… there’s nothing for me to be jealous of. Because there is no you, and there is no me. Enjoy the ride.
TL;DR: Jealousy (and narcissism) are “short circuit” problems that only happen because we take a narrow shorthand view of life and people. Acknowledge that everybody is infinite and there’s nothing to be jealous about.”
“Resentment is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die.”